Many couples face a period when passion seems gone, and they feel bored by their partner and their relationship. Does this sound like you right now? You have been together for a while. Maybe you live together. You eat together, and you sleep together.
Perhaps you have kids, and each of you is caring for them. Sometimes, you forget to care for your relationship while tending to daily tasks and routines. And this is how it becomes just another chore…
You still love your partner, but you seem not to be in love with them anymore. However, you are not fighting, and you live peacefully and comfortably together. If you feel that something is missing and the spark is gone, you might be longing for some excitement and some passion in your life. How to assess if your relationship is worth saving and working to transform, or is it just boring beyond repair?
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In the beginning, everything is fascinating. Just the thought of your lover makes your heart pound at a higher frequency. We feel a rush of adrenaline before each date. And a lot of butterflies in the stomach too. This is passionate love.
Studies show that it takes 12 to 18 months for this intensity to subside. And it always does. The honeymoon effect is just a temporary phase of a couple’s life.
When the Passion is Gone
You might start finding imperfections in your partner. You start feeling certain behaviours and traits irritating or even gross. We all have flaws. Our human bodies occasionally get dirty, sweaty, impaired digestion, and sick.
When you start discovering your partner is not as great as all that, you may feel less attracted to them.
Companionship vs. Love
True companionship means not only burning desire and passion. It means trust, support, intimacy, and genuine friendship.
It means that you rely on each other to journey through life. This does not mean your love life will be dull and sexless. You can work to increase the intensity of your passion.
Is your Relationship Worth Saving?
You must take into consideration several essential aspects. And the most important is related to trust. Do you think your partner is an honest person? Can you believe they are truthful to you? Do they have your best interests at heart?
If you think that your partner cares about you, you have an excellent basis for saving your relationship.
You need to consider your values. Make a list of the most important things for you, something you cannot compromise on. This involves religious views, ideas about family life, severe health issues, and ways to address them.
If you have values that match and complement each other, you are already a step further toward saving your relationship.
One of the most crucial aspects is how you manage difficulties. How do you handle stressful situations? In a long-term relationship, they will inevitably arise.
When conflicts and disagreements come about, what do you do? Do you drift apart or handle them together? Do you fight the person and not the problem?
Having a positive and constructive way of managing difficult situations makes the union more likely to last.
Do you Have Unreasonable Expectations?
Everybody has their version of happily ever after. We have grown up with the idea of a magical romance that is new and exciting. When the magic gives way to routine, you may feel disappointed.
If you expect to feel butterflies in your stomach and see fireworks in the sky every time, you might need to reconsider your priorities and expectations. Setting relationship goals can help.
Work Together to Reignite the Passion
Typically, the passion fades with time. This does not mean that, with proper tending, you can’t reignite it. With your partner’s commitment and your own, you can set the fires ablaze again. But it requires trust and hard work.
If you want to save your relationship and make it passionate and exciting again, you need to know how passion works.
You do not need to put up with a dull relationship. The romance and passion and the sexual arousal you feel towards your partner will make it last and feel good.
Research has shown that adding newness, mystery, and excitement to a relationship is key to reigniting the passion you once had. This is what made you fall in love with your partner once. It can happen again.
Activities That Add Excitement and Passion
You could engage in activities that bring about romance, like going to a new place together, exploring a new sport or hobby, or going on a date at a fancy hotel or restaurant.
Why not try a new sex toy together? The novelty will trigger your brain to feel more excited and happier. This will contribute to increasing the good vibes between you and your partner.
You might think immediately about role-playing and lingerie. This counts, and it is excellent. Another thing is a surprise date or gift. Tickets to their favorite show or a bar of chocolate they adore shows you deeply care about your relationship, and you would like to surprise them pleasantly.
An activity that gives you an adrenaline rush is highly recommended. The heightened awareness and emotional arousal are automatically transferred to your relationship. It could mean watching a thriller together or going on a terrifying roller coaster ride.
A vigorous workout is bound to get your adrenaline and endorphins levels up. And remember, the couples that work out together stay together!
In case that proves insufficient where the adrenaline rush is concerned, you might find sex toys worth exploring. If you’ve never tried them before, start with something basic like a dildo or vibrator, or a sleeve for men. Then, you can progress to more advanced options for couples, like strapons without a harness or other types of strapons.
All of the above can help increase the excitement in your relationship. It will surely last and thrive if you reshape your expectations and work hard with your partner to save it. Trust, intimacy, and shared values are the solid foundation for the flower of passion to bloom once again.